I’m going to take a break from story telling today, and talk about punishments in writing a DD, D/s, or BDSM romance.   Keep in mind these are only my opinions and really don’t account for much- other than I’m not just a writer, I’m a reader, too!

The first thing I look for in a punishment scene is sincerity.  Does the Dom really have a reason to punish, or is he just finding a reason to deliver a hot spanking.  I’m 1,000% in favor of titillating spankings, the hotter the better, but when it comes to punishment there needs to be sincerity.  I write mostly BDSM romances, and my Doms are strict and to the point. I try to keep their punishments limited to one, because punishments in a BDSM relationship are serious.  They aren’t delivered on a whim, and not just for fun.  Especially, if the sub enjoys a good spanking. If she does, then only a harsh spanking will get through to her. Something that is more extreme, something that pushes through the subspace and gets her attention.

That’s not to say the punishment has to be spanking. She or he could be punished in a variety of ways, but it has to be done with a serious tone. Otherwise, it’s all just play and personally, I find that irritating.

The second thing I try to accomplish with a punishment scene is to show the loving side of the relationship. Even the harshest punishments can be done with love, and should be done with love!  The chat and cuddle afterward is crucial. It pulls the characters from punishment mode (which is pretty much all business) to loving mode once again.  I don’t include sex with a punishment scene because I think that makes it more realistic, and it truly sets the stage as punishments.  Obviously, both sides are turned on by the power dynamic and the physical aspect, but it’s the purposeful action of not divulging in the sexual side that keeps the scene in punishment mode.  Morning after sex is great, thought!

Lastly, no wimping out!  If the Dom has decreed a punishment is coming, it had better arrive!  No backing out at the first sight of a tear drop.  Subs cry.  I mean if you saw an Alpha man striding toward you with a razor strap, you’d be tearing up, too!  That’s no reason not to follow through.  A huge discussion in BDSM is follow through and consistency. This also means no false threats. If he’s going to decree it, he better be ready to deliver it!  Otherwise, he loses credibility as a Dominant.

Punishments really aren’t fun to experience in real life, but they are extremely hot to read about!  And nothing is hotter than a strong, loving, Alpha Dom delivering a well-deserved punishment and teaching his sub a lesson she needs and craves. Because in the morning, when he rolls over and kisses her tenderly, right before he claims her body as his, the punishment is over, the lesson learned, and the love lingers on.  So, make it hot, make it loving, and please make it real!

I hope you enjoyed!  I love feed back of all varieties, even if just to say you came, you read, you conquered!   There is no requirement of a give-away with this challenge, but I love give aways!…I’ll be giving away a prize each week.  This week is a free c-copy of Secured Heart!   All you have to do is leave a comment and/or share the story.  No limit on entries, comment every day, share each post and up your chances.

And don’t forget to check out the other fantastic contributions!